


Love Is A Marathon

by bluestargirl6 (pressdbtwnpages), pressdbtwnpages



Category: Rent - Larson
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-06-05
Updated: 2006-06-05
Packaged: 2017-10-15 17:10:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/163011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pressdbtwnpages/pseuds/bluestargirl6, https://archiveofourown.org/users/pressdbtwnpages/pseuds/pressdbtwnpages
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>They’ll just have to content themselves with the idea of Roger-as-Guardian-Angel.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Love Is A Marathon

**Author's Note:**

> Post-Mimi. Sorry.

_"I'll give you stars and the moon and a soul to guide you And a promise I'll never go"_

Roger knows he’s not alone. He hasn’t doubted that since Mark first found him, beaten up in an alley, and dragged him into the loft, set him in his bed and spent the night on the floor.

If he’d known then all the shit he would put Mark through, that in the end he would have no choice but to abandon his best friend, Roger would never have started doing drugs.

Except that isn’t true and Roger knows it. He wishes it were true, but back then Roger had been too selfish and too shallow to care about anything but feeling good.

“You’re not alone,” Roger had announced when he returned from Santa Fe. It was empty reassurance and they both know it.

Every time Roger says stuff like that, or Mark absently talks about the future, they’re both flashed forward into that maybe not-too-distant future where Mark is alone.

And promises that Roger will never go, not really, they’re kind of hollow. Because despite what Mimi claimed about Angel and warm white lights, no one really knows. Yeah Mark has his rolls and rolls of film and acres of memory, but that’s not the same and neither of them is going to try to pretend that it is.

Sometimes Roger wishes they were different people. The kind of people where all of this intense deep love between them could manifest. Because Roger does love Mark. He wants to cling to the man and never, never let go. He wants to bury himself under Mark’s skin and keep them both safe from the inevitable future. But he can’t. They can’t.

They love each other so much, in so many way, but, just not in that way. Not enough to risk their lives for a few fleeting moments of comfort.

As much as he knows Mark will miss him, and Roger suspects that wherever he is he’ll be missing Mark too, it isn’t worth condemning Mark, dragging him down even further. Better for Mark to live alone than die alone. They’ll just have to content themselves with the idea of Roger-as-Guardian-Angel, some esoteric soul guiding Mark safely through until they can reunite.

It’s sappy and stupid and the thought shouldn’t be any consolation to a cynic like Roger, but it is. He’ll take care of Mark one day. And everything will be alright.


End file.
